Sunday, January 21, 2007

vicious cycle!

i have got to stop this vicious cycle of staying up too late. i've had two dizzy spells today. actually i've had them on and off for the last couple of weeks maybe?? but the last couple of weeks i have really truly been exhausted! that coupled with not eating much...probably not the best combo! i've been eating enough..but just enough....this is the first time i've stuck to the 'lose weight' thing and i'm afraid to mess it up. i have such an addictive personality. it's all or nothing with me. so i'm choosing to not go with 'all'.

i took a nap with ethan today. slept for an hour. sweet. but the problem? now i won't be ready for bed tonight at what should be (and probably is for most people) a normal bedtime. maybe i'll stay up for a while and scrap a page. then watch brothers and sisters. then go to bed. midnight...maybe i'll be ready for bed by then. that's early. i'll probably go to bed at midnight then toss and turn for an hour. see. it IS a vicious cycle. not sure how to break it.

i have just had absolutely no energy. nada. zilcho! james is making dinner. he said i get the night off. woot. but seriously. all i did today was help james with the christmas lights (take off the plastic hanger uppper thingies...and put them in the boxes, then hand the boxes to him so he could put them in the attic. oh and i did one load of laundry and unloaded the dishwasher. big woop. i have done nothing today! i have had absolutely no motivation!

did i mention e is being a beast today? he is. oy. rude. grumpy. yelling at zan. i think poor james has had enough. i know i have! wish i could figure out why some days he is like this. god....i just hope he gets over it before school tomorrow. i so do not want to go to the principal's office.

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