making a life for us somewhere else.
understanding and realizing i'm being negative (before it comes to fruition). shutting that shit down.
talking to the boys with love and understanding (even when i don't think i can).
taking those moments and turning them into something good.
if i don't show/teach them what is right and wrong, who the fuck will.
i sometimes forget you have to teach even the smallest of things. things you don't think you need to...you really do.
letting go of my anger toward james' family.
not sure i can do it. but i need to.
being able to sleep again.
being excited about life again.
i miss that.
looking forward to a time when i'm not so up and down.
wanting to get on with my life...yet not being fully able to do so.
watched dan with the boys tonight.
it was nice. made me smile.
he is a good man.
day two of no chocolate and no coke.
yeah...uh...i'm rethinking that.
i really really like coke. and chocolate.