Wednesday, February 11, 2009

a painting.

finished this today.












a simple thing can make me smile.
make all the difference in the world.
something unexpected can really make me angry. just like that.
maybe not angry. maybe it's hurt.
say when i don't think i'm invested.
but it turns out i really am.
that anger/hurt/disappointment can change quickly. to something else. to what exactly i don't know. definitely to being chill. and that's a good thing.
i just react.
took the boys to grief counseling today.
alexander is sleeping in his tent, instead of his bed. i dig it.
ethan, however, is sleeping in my bed. which means i'll sleep like crap tonight because he will be glued to me once i get into bed. he needs so much comfort. i don't like letting him sleep with me. he really needs to be in his own room. but thought tonight he needed it.
really wanting (as i've said many times before).....to lose myself in an all emcompassing sort of way where there is nothing but instinct. with that comes strong.....well.....everything. and i need that.

5 comments:

Patrice~ said...

you know, I never to think
to consider grief counseling
after Tom died . . .
diggin' the artwork, Kimberly.

Emily Falconbridge said...

wow, i am loving all your paintings!
looking forward to seeing you next month...we will have to get out the paints together :)

Lisa said...

you are working through it girl
and it's all kinds of beautiful and sad
all at the same time

Anonymous said...

Hugs to you...
I think I might have to beat you up and steal your painting. :)

Marieke said...

I reckon getting lost for a little while in some way would be quite cleansing for you.
Still so pleased to see you painting again. It is one kind of release no?
I did grief counselling when I was 7... I'm sure a lot has changed since then. Mine wasn't the best experience. I had an absolute idiot for a counsellor. Even at my young age I knew she was rubbish. Anyway, hope it helps the boys. Now don't throw anything at me but have you thought about going yourself? Not saying that I think you need it but perhaps something to consider? Just to let it all out. Unrestricted.