finished this today.
a simple thing can make me smile.
make all the difference in the world.
something unexpected can really make me angry. just like that.
maybe not angry. maybe it's hurt.
say when i don't think i'm invested.
but it turns out i really am.
that anger/hurt/disappointment can change quickly. to something else. to what exactly i don't know. definitely to being chill. and that's a good thing.
i just react.
took the boys to grief counseling today.
alexander is sleeping in his tent, instead of his bed. i dig it.
ethan, however, is sleeping in my bed. which means i'll sleep like crap tonight because he will be glued to me once i get into bed. he needs so much comfort. i don't like letting him sleep with me. he really needs to be in his own room. but thought tonight he needed it.
really wanting (as i've said many times before).....to lose myself in an all emcompassing sort of way where there is nothing but instinct. with that comes strong.....well.....everything. and i need that.