Thursday, March 19, 2009

i have no idea who this dude is.

but he's a surfer. and that's all that matters. took this photo while hanging out at the beach with my thailand girls. it's one of my all-time fave photos. a dude. and his surfboard. the ocean. hello. what else is there?
i miss james.
i miss 'us'.
i miss touching him. him touching me. our everyday contact. hugs, kisses....exchanging looks....i miss the intimacy we had.
i always feel like crap when i get back from a roadtrip. the last two nights have sucked.
it's a true story that life goes on. it does. i am ready for that. i'm not quite sure how to put all this behind me, yet still keep james a part of the boys' lives. it's all very confusing.
i haven't had much alcohol lately.
i haven't had much caffeine lately. just enough to keep me from falling asleep while driving to/from L.A.
looking forward to a time when i can sleep. peaceful sleep. not the kind where i wake up 50 times a night and toss and turn.
looking forward to not feeling empty. to being excited about life.


Violet said...

It'll come, my dear.

One foot in front of the other until you've reached where ever it is you're supposed to be, right?

I love the surfer picture,too. :]

Michelle Springer said...

I have several pictures of that SAME surfer. I haven't edited my pictures from Saturday yet, but when I do, I'll post them on my blog.

~Amie~ said...

I love the photo too Kimberly. HUGS!

Lisa said...

You are finding your way chick and I'm glad you have us to share the journey with. Surfer dude rocks. I can so see this one transformed into a painting. And I usuall can't when I look at photos.

Patrice~ said...

I think you're getting there.
Spring is here. Or almost, anyway.

Marieke said...

Keep going girl, keep on going. You'll get there. I promise. And yeah, I like surfer dude too.

Anonymous said...

that shot is perfect.
i hate coming home from a getaway too.
the bubble bursts pretty fast.

i cannot fathom all that you have to wrestle with everyday. i can say, having met you, you are doing a fantastic job. your boys are doing wonderfully. you have each other. you have us too.


Anonymous said...

whats cool is that he probably has no idea who he is either. aren't we all in that situation? but from the photo he looks like he has it all together; free and loving life. M