my nephew wants to get a tattoo with me.

dixie rose tattoo shop.
come on.
ya gotta love it.
my nephew, matthew, wants us to go together and get a tattoo.
only prob is...where i want my tatoo?
he shouldn't be seein' that.
allergies are kicking my ass today.
spent an hour of my day yesterday practicing yoga.
trying a new unwind/end of the day yoga tonight.
3 lonely little red bulls left my fridge.
haven't had any red bull in a couple of months.
everything...and i do mean everything...from the attic and garage has now been sorted through, packed, sold or donated. that was my weekend project. getting rid of everything i had gone through.
it is done.
the garage is very empty.
two people asked me this weekend if i am divorced.
one person (who obviously doesn't know me well) asked me what my husband does for a living.
my friend jan told me today, as we were driving down the road, she is sad that i am moving.
she told me i am funny.
it's interesting the way people see you.
not the way you see yourself, that's for sure.
i see myself as scarcastic (moreso than funny)...slow with comebacks..but when i finally do think of 'em they're damn good. ;-)
jan says i am strong.
i can be.
but am not always.
she says i am not paralyzed.
that i am getting things done.
my head is clearer than it was in the beginning.
i see therapist dude tomorrow.
since our appointment last week i have replayed the four words he said to me.
"kimberly, it's not your fault."
are therapists allowed (uh...like there's some rule book??) to tell you those kinds of things?
even if they are not, i am glad mine did. that he does.....that he WILL do that.
with the concentration and focus on breathing during yoga, i hope to be able to slow (and calm the pounding of my heart).
i can make the shell of my body relax.
but have yet to get to my core.
to truly relax.
to control my heart rate.
my heart often beats...no....pounds in my chest.
i can feel my pulse throughout my body.
it's a trip.
i'd like to be able to control it.
by breathing...and focus....
i think that is some powerful shit.
i am going to do yoga every day for the next week.
even when i hurt (some of the poses are damn hard)
there will be no excuses.
part of yoga for me, is trying to get myself back in balance.
to put the things that occupy my mind...totally out of my mind.
to let go.
also hoping it will help me sleep.
pandora is pissing me off (their sneaky commercial inbetween the occasional song.
sick of the one hundred million billion degree temps over these last few days.
did i mention how much i hate hot weather??!!
think i upset james' sister this weekend.
i think james' mom is wondering if i even have a heart right now.
because i have gotten rid of so much of his stuff.
not something i think she was prepared to deal with.
since the boys and i were sick my appetite is fucked.
all i want is ice cream, candy bars and coke. oh. red licorice too.
i find that yoga on a full stomach is NOT a good idea.
especiallay if your stomach is full of...uh...ice cream. candy bars. and yeah...coke.