Thursday, May 21, 2009

no, i'm not dead. just laying in the middle of my driveway.

one of my favorite photos of ethan. walkin on the beach. drinkin hot cocoa. nice.
my toes are now metallic blue. sweet. nice change from the purple that they were (that everyone thought was black). they will be black. at some point.
feeling fuckin' destructive.
that comes and goes.
well. no. it mostly comes.
but i mostly maintain.
feeling overwhelmed today (i was sorting through some of james' things in the garage).
so i layed down in the middle of the driveway.
to fucking get my shit together.
needed just a minute.
and jan drove by (she lives a few houses down).
we ended up spending the evening together.
dan invited us for dinner (he cooks...jan does not)....
jan and i took a long walk.
we talked.
dan and rachael had the boys.
i don't know what i'm going to do withtout her/them (when i move).
that's gonna suck.

5 comments:

Misty said...

Jan's good people. <3
I can't believe a toenail polish virgin like you is already getting mettalic blue....moving kinda quickly there, don't ya think? ;)Next time you come see me, can I paint your toenails? I like to paint my friend's toenails-just a little weird thing I do. :P

QuirkyGirl said...

I love love love that you just laid down in the driveway. Because that's where you were and that's what you needed to do. You have more courage than you know.

Sara said...

When I was in high school we layed down on the sidewalk out front of our house to watch a meteor shower. The neighbor woke us up the next morning thinking we were all dead or something. She was also the only neighbor in that subdivision that was worth knowing.

Yeah for the Jan's of this world!

jensmack said...

Okay. So now I need to find the photo (of course there's a photo) of my toes painted dark purple. Seriously.

Driveways are good for laying down in... that's why they're flat.

xoxo

Leah said...

your title made me laugh...and hurray for your Jan...and all the caring neighbors out there!