Monday, July 21, 2008

i'm afraid to go to bed.

is my table here yet? no? why the hell not. i want my table.
i am afraid to go to bed. it's when i go to bed that i toss and turn. sleep for 20 minutes then wake up feeling the river of snot coming out of my nose will never stop. oh. sorry. was that too graphic for you?
i really am scared to go to bed. it's almost as if my allergies are waiting. waiting for me to get comfortable and TRY to fall asleep. do i have some internal allergy alarm clock that oh, say about 2am decides it MUST go off??? oh, some nights i'm lucky. it happens at 3am. OR...it happens at 2am and then at 3am E wakes up crying for some reason or another. and then i am up. until 5am. or 6am. just in time to catch a snooze before alexander is awake (which means so am i).
i should go to bed. i need to go to bed. but i am afraid. very afraid. i am soooooo fucking tired of waking up 50 million times a night. but especially, for the last...hmm...what is it now? three weeks??? waking up because my allergies are so bad i literally cannot breathe. so i go sit in the shower and let the steam fill my face and lungs. i sit in the shower until the hot water runs out. then i take more allergy pills and try to go to sleep because no matter how hard i try, i can't keep the morning from coming. i must rise and shine. waaaay toooo early.
off to load up on allergy pills and try yet again. here's hoping i sleep. i am beginning to wonder just how much a body can take. just how much lack of sleep can i handle? wait. do i really want to know the answer to that?!! no. i do not. maybe tonight will be the night that i sleep. i hope.
and WTH. a post without a pic?? yeah. um...haven't taken any pics in a while. i should get on that. i'll add that to the list of the other million trillion things i should do.
and yes. i have seen an allergy doctor.
even prescription drugs do not work.
i am allergies to...wait. it will be quicker to tell you what i'm NOT allergic to. so the shots thing??? yeah. um. no. not happening.
when does summer end???
or when can i move.
it's like, holy crap. i wake up (after barely sleeping) and feel like crap. i get up, shower and feel a bit better. for a while. then it all starts over again.
maybe if i never leave my house the allergies will subside? at least briefly???
dramatic sounding, i know. i guess that's what lack of sleep does to a woman! lol....
now i really am off to medicate myself and try to sleep.
am i a broken record?? do i ever talk about anything other than not sleeping and allergies? can you say.........boring??!!! ah. yes. the exciting life i lead. heh! lol....

8 comments:

Lisa said...

Chick...I don't know what to tell you. That just stinks. See here I would have thought the freaking desert wouldn't have lots of allergens, say compared to Atlanta which is allergy central.

UGH...I wish I had a magic wand to wave over you.

Instead I'll just send you cyber hugs!

Patrice~ said...

Hot.
Toddy.

Misty said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Misty said...

hey Kimberly, have you tried the local honey? Supposed to work wonders for allergies. I read an article not too long ago...let me know if you can't find info, I'll see if I can find it.

Sweet dreams.
xoxo

Misty said...

Sorry, I sent the same comment twice. DUH

Clare - Aust said...

Hon. I hear you! I have a number of allergies too. Got so bad I sat through my highschool exams with a mini-mountain of soggy hankies to keep me company. To make matters worse - the inside of my ears and the back of my throat were as itchy as all get-out. So I hear you! Why "no" to the shots? I had them... and I hate needles. It made the world of difference to me.

jensmack said...

Ugh - that sounds terrible!! I am so sorry!!

Anonymous said...

Try a Neti pot? Gross, but it sounds like you could use every little bit of help.

Itchy, oozy ears (doc called it a volcano in my ears) and itchy mouth here, too, like Clare. Xyzal helped a bit. I'm thinking Winter in Siberia might help, too. Sigh.