this week i have been preparing.
preparing to get on a plane.
to go back.
back to the place that holds so many memories for us.
part of me, doing right by the boys, and james....
is taking the boys to see his mom.
and his sister.
and her kids.
going back is NOT something i want to do.
but i'm doing it.
because it's the right thing to do for the boys.
because if it had gone the other way, and i had been the one that died, i would want james to do the same for me.
worked on this painting last night.
it made me focus.
THAT is a fucking amazing part about painting.
how once you start, and are focused......
IF you can get focused.....
once that happens....
listen to music.
and just be.
while you create something.
something that comes from inside you.
still not done.
but the tone has changed.
another layer has been added.
it was nice to paint last night.
i needed it.